By Qianyu (Margaret) Cheng
Hey everyone! It's me, Margaret again. It's so nice to see you all. For those who are new here, welcome to the U of I! My name is Qianyu Cheng (but I also go by Margaret). I was born and raised in Hangzhou, China, and I am a junior majoring in Actuarial Science. As an International Student Orientation Leader (IOSL), I greeted freshman and transfer students at the beginning of the semester. I will also be your blogger for International Student and Scholar Services Blog for the rest of year! I am so excited to share my stories and tips with everyone!
As an international student whose native language is not English, I experienced lots of communication gaps when I first came to U.S. After a 13 hour flight, when I finally got to the Chicago O’Hare Airport and waited for the bus to come to Champaign, I was so tired and hungry. Yet I didn't go to the nearest McDonald to buy anything because I was afraid of talking and making mistakes when I ordered food.
As soon as I got to U.S., it felt really weird at first when everyone around me suddenly begin to speak English all the time. During the lecture, the discussion, even when in the dining hall, whenever I was with other American students, I felt like I had been put in an American TV show. Like back when I was in China I loved watching some of the TV show, like Big Bang Theory or How I Met Your Mother. So, I just opened the mouth and stared at them like I was watching the show, but this time there were no subtitles anymore. It took me a while to adjust to the real life atmosphere, but the context of the show started to bother me. I've been studying English since first grade, but what I learned focusing on writing and reading parts much more than the speaking and listening parts. Sometime it takes so much time for my brain to process a word that was in a sentence, and when I finally figured it out, the conversation was already far off. I was also not confident with my accent so I rarely talked.
Although it seems really hard at first, the communication gaps can be solved, and I feel more comfortable speaking to the others now. However, In order to overcome the gaps and build a bridge between the TV show and the real life, I did try very hard to navigate between English and my native language. Here are some of my experiences.
At first, I was so afraid of making mistakes that I tried to avoid talking to native speakers as much as possible. As a result, in the first several weeks of my freshman year, I was completely silent. Sometimes I didn't speak a word for the whole day - except when the students from my home country talked to me in my native language. However, it is no way for you to improve if you don't even try. If you don't try at all, what's the point of studying abroad? Don't worry too much: just open up. When I told an American friend about this, she laughed and said: "Don't worry about making mistakes! Our Americans sometimes can't understand each other. Your English is pretty good already.” So I started to speak to the others.
However, it did take time for me to speak out in English spontaneously. Whenever I wanted to say something, I had to translate it from my native language to English in my mind and it usually took a while. It was the same thing concerning listening. Every time when a small group discussion was going on, I seemed to be not involved in discussion and felt anxious. But it was just because my brain had to run an extra simultaneous translation machine. Especially when I was in a group and other students were all native speakers, their discussion was so intense that I can merely follow, not to say participate. I felt bad that I could not contribute to the group, and other students thought I wasn't paying attention.
However, I didn't give up. There are plenty of clubs on campus, as well as lots of activities and events. I started to volunteer as a tutor in an elementary school, and began my leadership certificate, as well as applying for the job as an IOSL. It is just a matter of time and practice. On the academic side, when I can't follow the lecture and missed out some of the knowledge, I went to office hour for help, and professors and teaching assistants are all here to help me.
Still, I was lacking confidence. I always thought people may judge me on my slow speed of speaking or accent. So as a result I didn’t dare to look into the others’ eyes and I was afraid of saying “Hi” to strangers. However, when I was doing one of the events for the leadership certificate called Imprint, we had a chance to get into a small group and we got to know a group facilitator, who is an alumnus. Since Imprint is a program about how to manage yourself during the time of change, I shared my experience of studying abroad and how to get through the change of everything. And my facilitator, a human resource advisor, told me that he admired international students a lot, since he had a study abroad experience before too and knew how it felt like.
When I said that I was still nervous about my speaking, he encouraged me that:" You are already bilingual, and you are here all by yourself in a completely different country, and you are doing great.” Not only him, another friend I knew from my club also said he thought international students are brave that they came all the way to U.S. to study. Thanks to so many encouragement and warmness, I learn to be proud of myself.
Once I was really upset and thought I couldn't never communicate with the others, but that's because I thought I couldn't. But yes, I can! There is nothing to be afraid of. I am the same, one of the students from University of Illinois, just like everyone else. Just open up with smile, speak your idea out. So believe in yourself, you can do it!
Here are some of my experience of navigating through my native language and English. Although I am still on the way, I am so thankful that all the people who helped me go through all of the hardship and I really learn a lot. And you will be there too. Welcome to U of I, our fellow orange and blue! Thank you for reading, and see you on the next post!