When we are young, our first experience with listening is most likely being demanded to by our caretakers. The adults are in charge, and we are to listen–that’s just how it is! However, once we begin to age and develop our own opinions and thoughts, listening becomes a more complex process and a vital skill a good leader must have. Before moving on, I want to define listening so there’s a mutual understanding of what I’m referring to. Listening, and I mean really listening, is a process where you choose to pay attention to something that is being communicated to you, internalize it, and reflect on it in a way that is appropriate for the situation. Listening is very different from just hearing. Hearing is when communication goes in one ear and out the other. Listening can look like anything, from asking clarifying questions to giving an acknowledging nod. Let’s talk about a few things to consider when you practice listening.
• Relationship: What kind of relationship do you have with the person you are listening to? Is this your best friend, or your manager, with whom you must remain professional?
• Situation: What is being communicated to you?
• Setting: Where is this conversation happening? Is it a place to stop and share a hug? Is it very quiet or super loud?
• Perspective: Recognize that the person you are communicating with is very different from you. Their perspective on the situation could look entirely different from your own!
People in leadership positions often face the challenge of balancing the influence their voice carries. When someone dominates the conversation by speaking too much or too loudly, they risk silencing others, which in the end benefits nobody. Genuine listening opens the door to deeper connections and levels of understanding. It also makes room for stronger relationships and greater trust. On the flip side, failure to listen can lead to a myriad of problems, such as miscommunication, damaged relationships, and unnecessary conflict, all of which no one wants. So, take a step back, tune in, and listen up!
