Life is complicated. Humans are complicated. Seemingly, everything that goes on around us is complicated. With the days becoming busier by the minute, piling responsibilities and relationships to manage, and squeezing in time to practice self-care—how can we do it all?
Self-management.
It sounds easier said than done, and most of the time, it is. So how do we manage to live a life that you are proud of? In my personal experience and on my journey to develop better self-management for myself, I found three mindsets to be especially helpful in pushing my life in the direction I want.
- Being Curious
This may seem like a no-brainer, but oftentimes, I feel that we forget that our curiosity can be our biggest asset. Having the ability to look for options that break the status quo or think outside the box is one that is unique to humans – so why not use it more? Being curious about the world around us, or even the simple things, such as “I wonder what makes my food taste so good right now,” could help us become more open-minded about different opportunities and push us to explore more.
- Exploring Opportunities
I have always been told to never shut down an opportunity until I explore it. Whether it's about trying calamari for the first time, trying on a shirt my mom wants me to wear, or applying to a job that’s across the country, trying new things has been engrained in me. I recognize that it is a daunting task: sailing the unchartered waters of a new task . But to move forward, letting go of the “what ifs” and expectations regarding the outcomes is an integral step. Another key element is embracing the teachings that come along with failure or disappointment as often that is where we learn the most about ourselves and how to be better
So now, I can proudly say that I did try calamari, and I did not like it. But now I know more about my food preferences and am open to revisiting it again (maybe 5 years in the future, though).
- Reframing Problems
A lot of times, we trap ourselves in thinking a certain way about a situation or problem, and it limits us when problem-solving. There no wrong way to approach a problem, but knowing how be adaptable and take a different approach is often a good way to move forward. It’s hard when you’re knee-deep into the problem and it feels like there is no way out. But remember, no matter how big or small, there is always some type of solution, and it is all about how you look at it. So sometimes, taking a step back and asking yourself, “Why am I thinking the way that I am right now?” and truly evaluating your biases will help answer some questions you couldn’t find the answer to. Other times, it may be needing to build encouragement within yourself to be curious and/or try stuff to get you out of the rut.
If all of this seems like a lot to start right now, that’s okay! Self-management is a journey, and it doesn’t happen overnight. If you need a good place to start, my recommendation is to grab yourself a planner or a journal and record all the responsibilities, aspirations, and goals in your life – honestly, anything you find relevant. Having a solid reference point helps you stay grounded and understand where to point yourself.
And to be completely honest, the three mindsets I have been using are not an Irene-Park-original. They are the three out of five mindsets outlined by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans, authors of Designing Your Life. If you’re interested in figuring out what you want to do with your life, how to start, and start building a journey that you are proud of, I highly recommend this book!